What I learned about the USA this time…

Every time I come to the good ol’ US of A, I learn a bit more about the place. Here’s the accumulated wisdom from this trip to Florida:

• Even the most serious of actors is very silly when dubbed into Spanish.
• Cars in Florida have three wiper settings: low, medium, and hurricane. The torque generated by the latter setting is potentially strong enough to warp the chassis of lesser vehicles.
• There is absolutely no excuse to be fat in this country. Everything, and I mean everything, comes in a low fat, low sodium, sugar free, zero trans fat, zero cholesterol version. I would not be surprised to see low fat lard.
• The letter ‘v’ is a significant obstacle to many hispanic imports.
• Credits are squeezed into as small a space as possible to allow the next show to start immediately, but there’s always plenty of time for ad breaks.
• My only experience of the weather this trip has been ‘airconditioned’. People rely on it way too much here.
• Having a radio station that plays nothing but rock all day long is awesome, even if they do play Knocking on Heaven’s Door a little too often.
• Geiko is so easy even a caveman can do it.
• Grande Orange Mocha, iced, no fat, no whip
• It’s entirely possible to sleep for up to four hours in Miami International in relative comfort, if you’re fairly ingenious and not too wide across the middle.

And that’s all i have to say about that.