Scientologist Responds to Tom Christ Story

I managed to save this gem of a comment from the clutches of Akismet, which had fittingly marked it as spam. In response to this post reporting that Tom Cruise was being lauded as the Christ of Scientology:

 This story, from a “report” by one of England’s worst tabloids “The Sun”, is a serious crock of sh!t.

It is also harmful, libelous and foments incorrect notions about my religion Scientology so as to cause strife and intolerance.

In actual fact, nobody within the Church of Scientology considers themselves to be “Christ-like” – this would be a very inappropriate and arrogant comment and I’m sure you can see how this is being used only to antagonize Christians everywhere.

We Scientologists appreciate Tom Cruise’s efforts as a spokesperson of many of our Church’s initiatives. But he’s just an actor, holds no rank within our Church, and is by NO MEANS a “prophet” – and I am certain he himself would be embarrassed at the thought.

The “Sun” is lying. You can see the Church’s official statement here:

Please get in touch with the Church’s Media Relations department, at

Thank you.

Greg Churilov,
Scientology Parishioners League

PS: By the way, you might remember that, before he dared speak out against Big Pharma, Tom Cruise was a generally well-liked actor. If you think about it, standing on a couch is not *that* big a deal. The fact is that the drug companies have engaged in a whisper campaign of character assassination on this actor. And with good reason: since Cruise spoke out, sales of Ritalin are down 21% in USA, sales of Paxil are now banned in the UK by the UK FDA, and the U.S. FDA requires blackbox labels on all antidepressants. And Big Pharma is mad, their pockets have taken the hit.

Is it just me, or does a comment like this just make their religion seem all the more ridiculous? Especially the postscript, where the author lets go of his prior restraint and explodes into the frothing anti-psychologist anti-pharmaceutical dementia so typical of the Friends of L. Ron.

Greg – it is not articles like the one you are complaining about that make people think scientologists are a bunch of nutcases. It’s comments like yours.


15 Responses to “Scientologist Responds to Tom Christ Story”

  1. “Big Pharma” score one point on the moonflake loon-o-meter

  2. In fairness, The Sun is one of the worst newspapers in the English speaking world for just making up crap to sell newspapers.

  3. Whenever I read about “Big Pharma” I picture a gigantic version of that guy in American Gothic.

  4. Con-Tester Says:

    Mission Impossible XIV, perhaps? Cruise faces off the evil cohorts of Ciba, Roche, Du Pont, Pfizer et al. Shoots a great number of straw men in the process.

    “Incorrect notions about my religion Scientology”? Are there any correct notions in Scientology? Any at all? And how are the fabrications of The Sun somehow less plausible in comparison? Something about a kettle, a pot and some soot in there.

  5. i just love his little comment “standing on a couch is not *that* big a deal”… you’re right it’s not. Jumping on a couch on the other hand…

    schpat: you see what i mean…
    Andy: made up or not, you have to admit that with scientologists, it sounds plausible
    kyknoord: man that show was awesome. And it got one season. And 18 Wheels of Justice got 17 or something. I hate television networks.
    Con-Tester: have you looked at the link he provides to the church’s response? All it does is deny on behalf of David M, without any kind of actual evidence, like say a quote from David M. doing some denying himself. How exactly do the plebs know what their fearless leader thinks? I mean, they’re probably not even OT-III…

  6. Con-Tester Says:

    The finer points of spindoctoring are at times amusing, at times infuriating to watch. Usually, however, there is at least some trace of talent involved.

    As to whether the Scientologists’ fearless leader actually thinks, that’s debatable.

  7. Some how the enraged Scientologist has missed the point of the article he took the time to respond to.

    -J. Kaiser

  8. Sorry. Can’t back you on this one, Moon. The Sun is trash – their modus operandi is to take create fictitious headlines that play to prejudice because people won’t question something they agree with. And it shouldn’t be used as a source by someone whose “mission” is debunking misinformation.

  9. Andy, in case you missed it, the tags on this post were Humour and Religion. I was poking fun, not taking it seriously at all. And I’d appreciate it if you would leave it to me to decide what my “mission” is, thanks.

  10. totaltransformation: you are correct, he has. The article he took the time to respond to was poking as much fun at Christianity as anything else. But as your blog paints you as a Christian yourself, I’m not surprised that you noticed.

  11. I am totally bummed now. Really wish I didnt spend so much money on the Tom on a Cross T-shirts. What am I going to do with R2000`s worth of Cruisefiction merchandise now?

  12. Moonflake: Not only that. When one uses the term “Christ-like figure” they are making a comparison that is obvious- and made even more obvious by the text. It refers to two aspects, Tom drawing attention to Scientology and Tom being attacked for his unorthodox views.

    And I have no doubt Tom Cruise has attracted more people to the Church of Scientology than any of its official recruiters- whether they be called prophets, disciples, whatever.

  13. Hi. I’m the supposed “nutcase” that posted that response.
    I’m glad you’ve all had so much fun with it.

    Still, the statistics I shared are factual, and can be verified with a little research.

    And I find it strange than none of you question how an actor can go from hero to zero in less than a year, only because he jumped on a couch. That doesn’t happen by itself. Sure, you folks are just riding along, having your Beavis and Butthead giggle. But to people like the makers of Paxil, or the makers of Ritalin, none of this was really about “funny” – it was about trillions of dollars at stake, and about an actor with great public influence making a dent in that profit. (Just like Oprah when she spoke against hamburgers – remember?)

    So you laugh and deride, if you want. But there are people whose whole jobs (six-figure a year jobs) are to spin the media so that Big Pharma profits grow unhindered. These people take their jobs seriously. And Tom Cruise got in their way.

    Scientology is NOT a Messianic religion. There is nothing Christ-like about Tom Cruise, nice guy though he is. And nobody in the Church of Scientology thinks otherwise. The article was clearly a way to cast aspersion at Cruise and his religion. A cruse, ludicrous attack – but obviously effective. Which also proves the target audience is not a very intelligent one.

    Scientologist and proud of it

  14. “a cruse, ludicrous attack” – methinks a certain Dr Freud might have things to say about that slip of the finger and the obsession it reveals, especially in the context of the rest of the post. I believe the word you were looking for there is ‘crass’.

    I wonder, Greg, what your opinion on Space Opera is? Do you believe in Xenu? Do you believe, as L. Ron has stated, that psychologists assisted Xenu in his genocide, and that they are the sole cause of decline in the universe? Do you find movie theatres uncomfortable after learning about the R6 implants? Do you believe that one day L. Ron is going to walk into a scientology center and sit down at the desk in the office that they keep open for him? Do you really think that if a woman says words during birth that she and her child will be engrammed? Do you honestly think that sitting in a sauna and eating oil is going to cure the brave firefighters still suffering the debilitating side effects of their heroism during the events of September 11, 2001?

    Or do you perhaps just like scientology because it gives you an excuse to stay off your meds?

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